I don't know if you've heard of her, but she's kinda famous now. She goes by The Krazy Coupon Lady and has now authored a book, been on a TV several times on various talk shows and the recent TLC phenomenon, Extreme Couponing! Her name is Joanie Demer, but growing up I knew her as Joanie Dunbar. She lived just up the road from my home in Chico, CA. We went to the same church and from the ages of 13-18 we were friends--best friends for about 2 years of that time, with one of our other great friends Mona. We girls were like an inseparable 3-some and had some amazing times together (The picture below is of our little gang at age 15/16--Joanie's in the middle--right before Girl's Camp with our church group, summer of 1998).
Over the years, particularly since I left home for college--followed by meeting and marrying my husband (now a Military man)--,we lost touch. I had no idea that she was even famous until about a week ago when my mom told me. I looked her up online and, of course, she looks AMAZING, and her website is awesome! I don't think I want to become an extreme couponer or anything, but I think I'm going to order her book because, like I said in the title of this post, I KNOW HER! It makes me feel a little famous just saying that we use to be such good friends. Plus, it never hurts to save a little money, even as a 'mild couponer'.Okay, so that's the background. Here's the real meat and potatoes of why I'm bringing her up--it actually has nothing to do with couponing. It's honestly the trigger for my last post about the question, "who am I besides a wife and mother?". All the thoughts and questions I talked about in that post surfaced after I learned about Joanie's success and accomplishments! She's my age, a grade below however, has 2 kids, her hubby's in the Military AND she's written a book, started a company (basically--see her website and you'll know what I mean), been on TV, and starred on a TLC special, plus looked AMAZING while doing all of it! To sum up my initial reaction, I'd have to say that I was JEALOUS! It wasn't that I wanted to be her or do exactly what she had done or anything, I just wanted to have more to show for my life up to this point.
I too have dreams to author books, become a motivational speaker, teach, and have a positive influence on the world, but I feel like I've made little, if any, progress toward any of those life ambitions. How is it that she's done so much? I don't want to leave my kids, or hire a nanny, or anything like that, so that I can go be a successful career woman. Like I said in my last post, I'm happy being a mother. I just want that little bit on the side, that makes me feel good about me, and puts my talents and skills to some visible use! Having 4 girls so close in age and as young as they are, doesn't warrant a lot of free or me alone time, but . . . if I planned ahead a little better (like I did today by getting up 5 AM), and scheduled that "me" time I think I'd be a better mommy and happier me.
So, that's the new plan I guess. Get up early everyday to exercise, and do whatever else makes me feel good about me--read, blog, edit pictures, craft . . . whatever I want basically and would enjoy doing uninterrupted and without little hands helping me out. So, I guess this means y'all (the y'alls come from our time in Texas) will be seeing a lot more of me. Now, I need to tackle my 1000's of digital pictures so I can FINALLY upload some of my girls onto this blog. My little munchin-ettes have grown SO much, it'd be nice to show you all how much they've changed. 'Till next time . . .
8 comments:
I really like this quote. It inspires me to be more confident in my abilities and myself.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
i couldn't echo your thoughts more. i don't even have the 4 kids, and yet i often feel the same way. here's to changing our lives! :)
I read her book! A friend in my ward loaned it to me, how fun that you know her.
A guy I grew up with (in my ward)'s wife won Mrs. Utah 2009. I felt the exact same way. It helped me reset my goals a little (or find them, the twins were 6 mo old), but it also helped me realize that when I try to go that direction, I feel the spirit pushing me back to where I am. And then I know I'm on the right path.
That's so funny, I actually have wondered once or twice what happened to Joanie (and Mona). I NEVER would have known had you not posted this. Great to see you're blogging again :)
How cool that you know her!
I completely understand what you're saying, Julia, about wanting to make a difference and feel like you're accomplishing something in your life. Being so busy as a mommy can make you feel exhausted and also a little discouraged at times. Especially when you see other young moms around you who are doing "bigger and better" things, it makes you think, "Hey! What about me? I'm talented too!" From one "common mom" to another, here's my encouragement to you:
Don't forget about the "Proverbs 31 woman" the Bible talks about. Her days are busy and full with taking care of her husband, children, and household duties. She wakes while it is still dark and in the evening, her light does not go out. She is like the merchant ships… she opens her mouth with wisdom…her husband safely trusts in her….her children call her blessed.
You know what I think? I think you've already got your goal right in front of you. You can make a huge difference in people's lives right now. Today! To your little girls, you are everything. Every day you're teaching them by your example how to become godly women in a world where pressures come from everywhere to be like the girls on magazines and TV. And you are an amazing encouragement to your husband. Your love and respect for him keeps him going and makes it all worth while. That's a big deal!
Know what makes me feel good about being me, even through all the business of life as a mommy and wife? Exactly what you mentioned in this post. It's being organized, prepared, and planning ahead. You then have things in order at home and have time to focus a little on things you enjoy. It takes a lot of work, but you'll see how better you feel when you're up and ready for the day when your children wake up. The house is kept tidy (most of the time;) and your husband is welcomed home to a loving wife, happy children, and a hot meal. It may sound very 1950's-ish and corny, but it's the kind of women God has called us to be…and it's not easy! Embrace the amazing and full life God gave you.
Love your honesty, Julia. Keep blogging! :)
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My new plan was the same! And I usually follow-through with my plans...but the latest babe seems to suddenly need to suck me dry through the night while the toddler has resumed night-waking. /sigh I'm sure my time will come, but I'm with you, I think this is the solution...TO EVERYTHING!
(Swingin' by your neck o' the woods after seeing a link to you on MMB)
I really can relate to your quest to find our inner woman and self that you talk about. As a fellow military wife with deployments, living away from my family (also in California). I thought I knew who I was then there was a change in occupation (Marines to SAHM) and babies and more babies. Thank you for the enlightening post!
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